Hare Krsna,
In Bhakti Rasamrta Sindhu (1.3.1), Srila Rupa Goswami gave nine symptoms of bhava bhakti or devotees who are situated in pure devotional service:
- Perseverance: remaining tolerant and patient, even amid disturbance.
- Utilization of time: Constant engagement in devotional service.
- Detachment: Completely indifferent to the objects of sense gratification.
- Absence of false prestige or pridelessness: To feel humble, free from the longing for being shown respect.
- Hope: To be always certain that Krishna will bestow His mercy on oneself.
- Intense Eagerness: An intense eagerness to achieve one’s desired supreme object.
- Nama-gane sada ruci: Thirst arising out of affection for constantly chanting the Lord’s holy names.
- Attachment to God’s qualities: A natural attachment to describe Lord’s qualities, pastimes and so on.
- Desire to Live in Dhama: The desire to reside in the places of the Lord’s pastimes such as Vrndavana.
Srila Prabhupada has touched upon a few of these characteristics in his purports of the lesson. He writes that pure devotees are completely detached from any tinge of sense gratification that appears in the form of material or spiritual desires, or liberation in the form of salokya, sarsti, sarupya, samipya, or ekatva. “A pure devotee does not render loving service to the Personality of Godhead for any cause or for any benefit, material or spiritual. This is the first symptom of unalloyed devotion.” (SB 3.29.11-13 Purport)
He also writes that “A pure devotee must engage in the service of the Lord twenty-four hours a day, without cessation; his life is so molded that at every minute and every second he engages in some sort of devotional service to the Supreme Personality of Godhead.” (SB 3.29.11-13 Purport)
As far my situation is concerned, I do not even have the courage to think that I will ever reach the level of pure devotional service anytime soon. This is because the mountain of anartas (unwanted bad habits), conditioning from past and present lives, and lack of any good qualification is so high and insurmountable. Therefore the only hope is hope as Srila Rupa Goswami has mentioned above – hope that Krsna will certainly bestow His mercy in me and on all of us.
However, I need to do my part. In meditating on areas that I need to improve upon to attain the stage of pure devotional service, a few stand out.
- Controlling my mind: I need to absorb my mind more intensely in Krsna consciousness. Lord Kapila mentioned that one’s mind should be at once attracted to hearing the transcendental name and qualities of the Supreme Personality of Godhead. I have difficulty controlling my mind and dovetailing it to Krsna’s service always. My mind is all over the place; it is hard for me to focus on any one thing for a long time. Like a restless monkey, my mind constantly jumps from thoughts of bhakti, to work, to bodily maintenance, to recreation, and so on. Unless I train my mind to fully devote to Krsna consciousness, my spiritual progress will be slow.
- Using my time always for Krsna: Unless I engage my time fully in the service of the Lord twenty-four hours a day, there is no possibility of attaining the stage of pure devotion. I have increased my chanting rounds and other sadhana practices. But I get tired after a while and resort to other non-devotional activities. Performing bhakti seriously is an extremely intense matter. My body, mind, and senses are not able to cope with that level of intensity yet. I cannot chant 24 hours a day. I cannot read or hear 24 hours a day. I cannot do menial services for a long time due to bodily limitation. I hope with gradually with sustained practice, I will be able to devote more time to Krsna.
- Getting rid of unwanted bad habits: Some of my anarthas are so deep-rooted that they are hard to get rid of. I have realized that I cannot uproot them on my own endeavors. Only Krsna can uproot them just as He killed the demons who represented different anarthas. Therefore, I need to surrender to Krsna more.
- Improving the quality of my chanting: Chanting is my only hope and something that we all have some control over. I need to improve my quality of chanting. As I mentioned in my previous forum post, I was not guided properly during my early days in ISKCON. There was too much push to increase the number of rounds rather than increase the quality of chanting. I still carry that baggage. As soon as I think of the desire to improve my quality of chanting, my mind tells me that it is going to take a long time to complete my 16 rounds. Then I fall back on speed to finish my rounds, and thus hamper the quality of chanting. Basically what I am doing is chanting in the mode of ignorance or passion. This is the result of bad association and bad guidance as mentioned above. Srila Prabhupada said in the previous lesson that we should not keep company with a Vaisnava who is in the mode of ignorance. I wish I had known this when I started in ISKCON. I wish I had the right knowledge to discriminate between the various types of Vaisnavas. On the positive side, it’s not too late to correct the wrongs and bad practices.
Thankfully, I do not have any desire for any of the five kinds of liberation. I honestly don’t know what they mean or what their experience is like. Thank God! I also do not have many material desires except the desire that somehow my material life is not too disturbed that it will hamper my bhakti.
As we discussed agreed in today’s Zoom session, let’s keep going on this journey. There is no cause for disappointment, hopelessness, or giving up. We may not have any qualification. Krsna and His pure devotees are our only hope, shelter, and lighthouse of bhakti. We are all in this together. Let us keep marching forward holding each other’s hands for support, encouragement, guidance, understanding, compassion, and love. All glories to Srila Prabhupada!
Krsna Katha 